I’ve started to come across some items on Wikipedia that are, well, typical Wikipedia goofiness, but they’re in some pretty depressing articles. I tried hard to find something more fun to write about, like elves or Gordon Lightfoot’s hit song “Canadian Railroad Trilogy,” but I kept coming back to these darker entries. In a way it’s almost a public service that I write about these, because the world can carry on without access to a well-written and informative crowdsourced article on elves, but not more serious topics. Really, you should all be thanking me for taking this on. What was I so upset about anyway? Jeez.
Now we get down to business. The first in the His Dark Wikipedia Entries series: Twinkie Defense:
The phrase “Twinkie defense” comes from Twinkies, a junk food product high in sugar.
Well, yeah. It wasn’t like the world thought it meant Twinkie the Kid was going to court and representing clients.
Hmm. It was times like these when I thought my Twinkie, who hated guns and had never been to any wars, was the bravest snack cake who ever lived.