Lame New World Week 4:Put That Thing Away Before You Get Us All Killed!

In Blog by Brady Carlson0 Comments

This project is off to such a lackluster start that a full introduction will only delay the inevitable pain that will come from some of these entries. So let’s just start ‘er up and hope that pushing forward will make things easier on its own.

The rules, once again: each submission can gain its movement up to ten points, or lose up to five.

The Star Wars Movement

A dancer dresses in a C3P0 costume
A Star Wars burlesque show? That’s not true… THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO, NOOOOOOO!!!!

Not that you need me to tell you what’s going wrong here, but let’s sum it up: C3P0 is fluent in six million forms of communication – and jiggling his chest at you is not one of them. Nor do I wish to see Boba Fett striking a seductive pose, or Jabba the Hutt… no, just no, and again, no. The shroud of the Dark Side has fallen, and FOR GOD’S SAKE PUT IT BACK ON ALREADY

By the way, I thought long and hard about ways to avoid showing you a picture of a suggestive dancer dressed as C3P0, but I felt you needed to know what was out there, so you could avoid it. Except that I just showed it to you. I’m very, very sorry.

Points: -5

The Robot Movement

Hey, finally a chance for the robot people not to be the creepiest ones in the contest, and they deliver a cool robot gymnast that can do the horizontal bar pretty well, providing it never has to land. The robot deserves at least as much credit as Kerri Strug got!
Robot on the Wheaties box
And you’ll note this robot is fully clothed, and thank goodness for that.

Points: +6

The Math and Science Movement

Hydrogen family

Who are these people, some kind of religious cult that worships fuel cells? Nah, more likely they’re just a family that likes hydrogen, and that strong show of support for an oft-neglected element is worth a point. Also, Hydrogen Family would be a great band name. “Hydrogen Family’s ‘Emo is the new black… again’ gets 0.1 out of 10 this month from Pitchfork.” See? It’s simply got to be done.

Points: +2

The Video Game Movement

Ninja Gaiden diorama

Hey, nice Ninja Gaiden diorama! Several of the 25 entries laid out here are well done, both as homages to video games and as old-school dioramas, though some are kind of weak, and how come there’s no Metal Gear diorama? Some unrealized potential for a fun idea.

Points: +5

The LEGO Movement

LEGO coat rack

This is a very cute LEGO coat rack, but there’s obviously something missing: where are the LEGO coats? Wouldn’t that be a big step in your quest to make LEGO reality everyone’s reality? Don’t work on the periphery! I’m getting more worked up about this than I should. It’s a nice coat rack.

Points: +4

So, after week four, the standings are as follows:

S.Wars Robots Science V.Games LEGO

5

-2

14

14

18

Until next week…

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