The soldiers' only redeeming quality is that they dress well and attack in formation – they're like an evil synchronized swimming team.
If you pay close attention to the dialogue, you'll hear the boss chew the trio out for eating 16 chocolate cakes"for the fifth time in a week." That's eighty cakes split among three guys - Kool, Buffy and Markie each gained 42 pounds that week in cake alone.
This movie isn't merely ignoring the comic universe, it's puking large pieces of colorful barf all over it.
"This scary movie was so un-scary I was waiting for Count Floyd to come out."
Looks like Nixon Everywhere is off to a rousing start...
When you're an 11 year old diehard wrestling nut in the midst of not only Hulkamania but Macho Madness, even a Dirk Benedict movie sounds exciting.
It would've been more fun for Jimmy to write something like "Dear suckers, you just shelled out six million bucks for a handful of us to write 24 recaps and long treatises on Emperor Palpatine's political beliefs."
"Having avenged his family, Cyborg Kevin Bacon and his half a teaspoon of remaining blood drive home to watch 'America's Funniest Home Videos.'"
"Foxtrap" is most easily broken into three chapters: 1) there's Fred Williamson, 2) there's a few other characters, 3) Fred Williamson kills the other characters.
The late 70's. Drugs. Terrible rock music. Jack Palance. Andy Warhol. Even more terrible disco music. A nerd getting doused in baby powder by a semi-nude maid. I'd go on, but this frightening description is making Cocaine Cowboys sound more interesting than it actually is.