My friend Sharon sent over this collection of presidential valentines, as envisioned by the World Book people. They each refer to whatever it is that each president is remembered for in popular culture, be it a famous quote (Kennedy says “Ask not what your Valentine can do for you, ask what you can do for your Valentine”) to a signature event (poor Herbert Hoover says he will “sink into a Great Depression without your love”) to simply dying (William Henry Harrison: “I can’t live without your love” – ha).

And then there’s the one for President Reagan. So is he asking Gorbachev to be his valentine? Or is this just an elaborate metaphor for courtship – you first demonstrate your strength and resolve but eventually find a partner in the opposing system that you can work with to negotiate treaties over intercontinental ballistic missiles… of love? Wouldn’t Mrs. Reagan have something to say about this? Someone help me out here.

Oh, and one last note: James Monroe? Ladykiller. Try out his line next time you’re trying to get a date: “My colonization of your heart is not an act of aggression, valentine!” Move over, Shakespeare’s sonnets!