Mondays Get Meta on this site, or maybe they don’t. I really can’t tell without my reading glasses:

Optometrist's business card is in really small type.

Does that say opthamologist, or optimist? Wait, why would an optimist have a business card? But I don’t see an H in the title… does that actually say optometrist? AN OPTOMETRIST DID THIS SMALL TYPE CARD? That is TOO MEAN, Doctor. Meta, yes, but too mean.

It’s a good thing this doc didn’t study to be an anesthetist. If he had, he’d hand you his card and as soon as you started to look at it you’ll feel dizzy and pass out.

Also, who prints a business card on this kind of cardstock anymore? It’s the same size of every other business card – one color, nothing special about it. Where is the foil stamping and embossing?