Our countdown now says farewell to David Lynch with the cast of “Twin Peaks” offering up a very David Lynchian Twelve Days of Christmas. I’ve listed them below so you can sing (talk) along:
Twelve (12) cups of coffee
Eleven (11) cherry pies
Ten (10) drooling Leos
Nine (9) owls lurking
Eight (8) dancing midgets (sic)
Seven (7) one-armed men
Six (6) fish in a percolator
Five (5) jelly doughnuts
Four (4) talking logs
Three (3) possessed souls
Two (2) secret diaries
And “a body, dead, wrapped in plastic.”
Members of the “Twin Peaks” cast put this together for KROQ radio in December 1990. To my knowledge, David Lynch isn’t on there, but he could’ve been: in addition to his singular contribution to movies and TV, he was a pretty capable musician who released several albums’ worth of music. The Lynch estate auction even sold a five-neck electric guitar made by renowned luthier Danny Carrington and designed by the director himself.
Lynch once gave a very on-brand assesement of his guitar playing: “I taught myself and I play upside down and backwards, like a lap guitar. I’m interested in making the guitar talk. It’s somewhat musical, but then again, it’s not.”
This Twin Peaks-style “12 Days” is more than somewhat musical. It is also more than somewhat messed up. But don’t be surprised if it puts you in the mood to share some jelly doughnuts, coffee and cherry pie with your loved ones this December. If any of them start backwards talking, though, steer clear of any mirrors nearby.

